5am

I hear him in the other room. He's still mumbling. "I don't know why" Why is it I'm not tired? Why is it that I feel like he still has these feelings. Why in the hell? He keeps on saying he's going to die, and wants to be younger. I'm thankful that I'm not. There is an aged wisdom that I don't want my youth back. I have accepted the higher power wisdom that hasn't given me children yet. If he/she sees the way he's acting there is a power to it. Then again, I look at others. I move forward with my own plans with no guide. No clear idea if I will cross those rivers ahead of me. I can only pray for help. So far when I needed a sign they have come. Now I need another one. So I'm sending this prayer or hope out into the world after this hard night. Send me a sign right or wrong. Send me an Angel to help me, to guide me